The Good Ole Days...

My dad worked his whole life as a tile mechanic. He tiled every mall in the Rochester area, many different schools, businesses, and all of our friends, neighbors and family's houses. He worked like a dog. He was on his hands and knees all day but no matter how tired he was, he would come in the house, find my mom and tackle her to the ground. She would be swearing, "Geneeee get off me, you sommanah bitch...ouch...my arm...you're killing me!" He would just squeeze her tighter. Sometimes he gave her the scissor hold with his legs and there was no getting free. We kids would be laughing and screaming, sometimes we would pile right on top of them. My mom would still be yelling "Geneeeeee...I can't breathe...you asshole...see what you started....get these kids off me!!!" Eventually he would let her go and she would swear all the way back to the stove..."Jesus Christ, everything is probably burned by now...!!" My dad would play with us until dinner was ready. He used to line us all up on the ground and play "steam roller". He would roll on us and squish us into the ground all the while making that vrooooommmmm noise as loud as he could directly in our ears. We could have easily ran away when he was rolling the other person but we stayed, waiting excitedly for our turn to have the breath rolled out of us. There was also the airplane game, Dad would lay on his back and pull his feet up, we would lay our stomach on his feet and he would lift us off the ground and fly us back and forth. I believe the plane known as Charlene crashed one day into my parents bedroom wall as the "pilot" lost control of her. Rose came flying in the room "You asshole, I knew you would hurt them one day....give her to me!!"
Dad also created the game "MMMMMMMM..ERTTTTT. For this game dad would be lying on the floor, we would sit on his stomach, and lean back against his knees. We would pretend we were driving...dad would say "MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...ah..MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...then ERTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!! Whenever he said ERT, he would flatten his knees and we would go flying backwards.

The bouncing games were my favorite. My dad again laying on the ground, we would sit on his knees and he would sing his made-up songs and bounce us on his knees to the tune. His most popular song was to the rhythm of Pop goes the weasel.

Hop around the vinegar jug,
the monkey chased the weasel
the monkey stopped to blow his nose
POP goes the weasel.

When dad said POP..he would fly us up as high as he could off his knees...and we would fling all over and laugh hysterically. Another song he sang for the bouncing game was ...

Tra-la-la-BOM-di-ay
They took my clothes away
But I don't care
I got my underwear

This time on the BOM he would bounce us high off his knees.

Here are more songs dad taught us...

Fatty and skinny laying in the bed
Fatty rolled over, skinny dropped dead

My daughter Leah's favorite song of my fathers is...

Fatty and skinny laying in the ditch
Fatty called skinny a dirty sommanah beech-nut bubble gum
Popcorn, grass
If you don't like it
Stick it up your ask
Me no questions tell me no lies, go and pick some apples
and I'll make you an apple pie

Told you he was creative. When I started school, my mom went back to work. So my dad would be the one responsible for getting us up and ready in the morning. He would stand at the bottom of the steps and yell out the Tarzan call, two or three times. He would come in our room and turn on the light, and after a little prodding we slowly got out of bed. My dad sat at the top of the steps and I would climb my sleepy self up on his back and he would give me a piggy-back down the stairs. Dad also made our breakfast. Every morning of our childhood we ate cereal. Seems like a nice normal breakfast doesn't it. Well, my creative dad gave us our cereal in coffee. Yup, we had our Frosted Flakes, Alpha-bits, or Cheerios in a big coffee mug filled with my dads perfectly brewed coffee (and people wonder why we are all so short). My dad still eats this for breakfast every morning, his fav is Kelloggs Corn Pops. My sisters and I survived growing up on this nutritious breakfast and the only side effects I suffer from is drinking my coffee with at least 3 heaping teaspoons of sugar in it.